IT'S HERE!!!!!!!!!!!! 

THE NEW JOURNAL!!!!!!!! IT'S HERE!!!!!!!!!!!

serenus_mores

<3 Ai

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO 
sanghamyers!!!!!








Random: Anyone else here addicted to Queer as Folk? 

Hey guys!

It seems like forever since I last posted.

There really isn't much to say....I guess I've never been much of a livejournal person ^_^.

However, I do love all my friends here. You guys are so supportive. And witty, you guys got a lot to say.

I'm having a hard time putting my feelings into words tonight, but I guess i'll just do it through music instead.

I just happen to be in love with the French right now. They make amazing electro-pop, I swear. 

http://www.youtube.com/v/LYaZYmTwOxA

This is yelle. She's a one-person artist, but she decided to hire dancers for this vid. 

http://www.youtube.com/v/5VxmRw6LmBQ

And this is TTC. They're.....themselves XD.

And Hande Yener isn't French, she's Turkish. But she deserves to be here. This song is Romeo. 

http://www.youtube.com/v/NDQTXhmm0Vo

Sorry for being so out of character ^_^. 

Oh noez....reading my own journal makes me depressed. T_T

I'm sure all my wonderful German friends are tired of my bitchings XD.
(I'm actually half-German in ethnicity, but that's besides the point XD).

Anyways....for those of you who know me in real life, I'm a fun loving gal who makes WAY too many j-rock yaoi jokes for her own good.  And I love being silly (especially with u, Nay) and listening to upbeat music! 

I guess when I got this journal, I wanted a place to vent my fustrations in life....

And I guess that's okay.  It's a journal with a spice.........XD.  And not everyone wants to see journal after journal of either; uptight, arrogant, bitchy fangirls OR journals that just use exceedingly horrible grammar to describe thier "LULZOMG" jrock entires. 

But, the latter is mucho fun, I have to admit. 

Ohhh, I just had a random thought......how does LiveJournal manage all the space to hold EVERY SINGLE JOURNAL'S massive amounts of entries, while letting us keep them? *ponders*

Anyways.....(XD I love saying that), let's get onto the fun stuff. 

1) Sugizo writes better English than I do.  Here's proof: 

http://blog.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=blog.view&friendID=1000249916&blogID=285225064

The man is pure brilliance. 

2) I REALLY need to learn how to use a freaking LJ cut XDDDDD. (And yes, I have read the tutitorial, thank you.) 

3) There is a considerable amount of hot debate on a world-wide issue; 

     Who's the true man-slut in S.K.I.N?
     
     Here's my intellegent and unabised opinion;
  
     --Gackt is too creepy to be teh kingz of teh man slutz.  Sure, we've all seen the PV's for "Vanilla" and "Illuminati", (and endless fanservice),  but there is an element of creepiness in that man's personality O_O.

    --Meevs is too ADHD too even remember what the word "slut" means.

    --My money is on either Yoshiki or Sugizo.  But, it is a draw.  They both have a lot of skankness between them. 
      Yoshiki has done 392589483290 nude photoshoots, and he doesn' wear pants.  He wears frumpy lace stockings.
      And even though Sugizo has reformed and calmed down, he was called the "walking porn".  And still, that man puts on his "smex" face everytime a camera is within 5 feet of him. 

Well, it doesn't matter, because I lub all of dem. May they continue rocking out, making music, and being dem fine selves.

4) IS ANYONE ELSE DYING OF ANXIOUSNESS BECAUSE OF THAT STUPID COUNTDOWN NUMBER-THINGY ON LUNA SEA'S OHP?  If you don't know what I'm talking about, then go here; http://www.lunaseagodblessedyou.net/. 

      That's the page you get when you go to their OHP.  OMGISTHEREAPOSSIBLEREUNION? *prays*

5) OMG!!!!!!! NEEDS TO FANGIRL!!!!!!!!!!!! *get ready*

     KAORU NIIKURA IS QUITE POSSIBLY THE SEXIEST MAN THAT HAS EVER WALKED AND BREATHED ON THIS PLANET!!!!! 

I WANT TO DO THINGS TO HIM THAT CANNOT BE SAID IN THIS JOURNAL!

6) Anyone else think it's a good idea to write a Kao X J X Toshiya? Anyone willing to do it? *begs*

7) Die and Pig are meant for each other, Sinead Moriah. Please accept it.....they want ur lub. *puppy eyes*

8) Kiyoharu has kawaii eyes.  I don't see the connection between him and Kyo though.  Why is he Kyo's idol?

9) Is anyone else in luv with Glay?

10) U2 is still the best Irish band in the existance of time.  Deal with it.

That is all. 

Fans herself after staring at Kaoru for hours.

Now that the school year is right around the corner, *shudders*, I have to voice my annual concerns. 

Today, I was reading this article on Yahoo! Music, that was talking about young women and their stress levels.

(Why it was in the music section, I'll never know XD). 

It was highly alarming.  Teens today get so stressed out, and for what?

Really, most kids in America live REALLY good lives.

But what's more alarming is that it's "cool" to be stressed out.  Just like it's "cool" to be depressed and see a shrink twice a week.

Whoever the hell started this is a complete idiot.

But unfortunately, I'm not excluded from seeing the daily effects. 

The school I go to has a high academic standard.  With that being said, you can guess the amount of stress that goes on in this buliding.  Some kids lose thier head and break down if they get anything less than an B plus. 

Now, my problem is stressing out, becuase im telling these people to GET THEIR HEAD OUT OF THEIR ASSES AND REALIZE THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN SCHOOL!!!!!!

It's okay to want to excel, but everyone takes it an extreme.  And the sad thing is that if you don't stress out, then you're seen as "stupid" or "apathetic".

Well, this year, I for one will not be a victim to this senseless nonesense. (XD that sounds so funny). 

And I'm going to just let people do what they want.  They still won't listen to me. 

Oh well, I'm not going to jepordize (sp?) my health for competition. 

Without your health, you don't have anything.

Earlier today, I went on a rant about my religion. 

I professed my disgust and anger within my own personal expierience.

I apologize to anyone who was offended. 

Consider the former post "a rant". 

I have no issues with the core ideas of religion, it is just that I'm skeptical. 

I have no idea what's going to happen, and in this part of my life, I am very confused. 

It might take years, say decades, before I come up with any answer. 

I might not come up with any "answer" at all. 

In fact, I'm no longer going to kill myself by forcing to come up with "an answer". 

The road of life is a bumpy and curvy one.  I've already expirenced some of it's challenges, but I never gave up. 

So I believe that I'm just going to be happy with who I am, and not worry about anything. 

Becuase I know I have some one by my side, no matter who they are.

And it will all come naturally.

Today, am I alarmed. 

Everyday, it seems like billions of people around the world rely on materialistic things. 

Their whole lives are devoted to possesions--things that could be easly gained and lost. 

So I asked myself, how do I stop worrying about our human state, and try to focus on my spirituality. 

I had to dig deep into myself. 

Today, I realized that life isn't as serious as what people say, and we should all learn how to lighten up.  I've always been of the serious nature, but I learned that my "miseries" can be abolished by my own will.  I want to just live freely and happily. 

Which brings me back to materialism virsus spirituality.  They don't directly contradict each other--they can exist happily, as long as you have a check on yourself.  But I feel that too many of the earth's children are giving up their natural spiritualism for something that has no real value--just temporary satisfaction. 

This is what alarms me the most.  As a child of this earth, I weep for our people.  I try to focus on my spiritual core, but it is polluted by the realities of the day.  I try so hard to focus, but the fear and worry overcome me sometimes, purely driven by emotion.  

Now, I'm not saying that this spirtual path is easy.  Especially living in the "instant gratification" society of America.  It really is hard.  Things that I rely on fill me up with satisfaction, but I am confused and worried when they are taken away from me.  Truly, I would want a spiritual core over possesion, since spirituality stay with you forever. 

Now, the great Hindu Guru Amma once said "In writing, you stop your sentences before creating a new one.  Well, death is like the end of a sentence.  Death should be a joy, beucase you are moving on to a new sentence."

Now, I must note that is not the EXACT quotation (since I vaguely remember it from a movie), but it is something close to that.  

I feel that Amma has just put into words what I have been feeling all along.  To many of us, death is something we are taught to fear, even though our values say we should not.  Death to us means that we can no longer enjoy our "materials" and we must part with them.  The acutally physical part of dying does not scare many people, it is leaving behind what you know and traveling onto an unknown world.

Many people ask why I post such personal thoughts on my LiveJournal, many of which can be easily seen by anyone in the world; and most of my friends here are strangers that I haven't met in real life (though I do love you dearly ;-)).

My answer is this.  We are all the children of the earth.  We are all equal and we all have certain needs.  Spiritaulity and religion is a hard and highly emotional road to travel in life.  If I have the knowledge that I helped at least one person by posting this, I feel like I have saved the world...

IT IS OVER!!!!!!!

.....art school that is. 

I'm kinda sad, in a way, but more excited.  I feel that I jumped through another hurdle in life, and I know myself (and my art) better in the process. 

It still hasn't hit me that I'm not going back.  Oh well, it was just a three week thing.  I will miss my friends, but I won't miss the pressure XD.

Tonight was the exhibit, and it went smoothly.  One of my best friends accompanied me, and several of my other friends came.  (So did my art teacher, she was so proud :-)). 

Anyways, the performing arts kids put on a GREAT performance.  They worked hard, and it definately shone. (spelling? XD)

 All-in-all, I'm really glad that I could expand my portfolio and learn more about my style.  I also learned that the art world is EXTREMELY competitive and some people are just bitches XD. 

On a final note, I was really pleased with the final pieces that made the show.  I was really proud of all my hard work, and it satisfied my demanding taste.  Good job Ai-chan. *pats back*

Mmmmm, this journal is basically about ranting XD. 

N.e.ways.....today's victims...uh topic, is good ole' Dir en grey. 

And before you say anything, it's not one of those "ZOMG DIRU SOLD OUT AND I TOTALLY HATE THEM" rants, it's an infrenece based on my own opinion.  I'm a HUGE dir en grey fan, and I love them to death (unless what happens in this rant becomes their overall attidtude).  So don't blame me for being anti-diru (for God's sake, I'm in love with Kaoru!), because it's simply not true.  You may speak your opinion (if you wish), but I'm not engaging in a flame war.  You have been warned. 

Hokay....I really only have one thing to complain about Diru.  

Ever since they've "made it" in America, their attitude towards their fans and popularity as a band have significantly changed.  It didn't affect much of the music (to some extent), but it made their fans say "Wtf is wrong with you guys?"  The fact is, Dir en grey have become the new assh**e band of j-rock.  This whole "coming to America" thing has made them cocky, and they think they are the hottest shiznit since sliced bread.  Now I am NOT oppposed to any j-rock band coming to America, I'm just opposed to them leaving their fans behind, and practically neglecting thier ties to the j-rock community. 

I think two quotes stand out in particular; 

Kyo: "The worst thing about the Japanese rock scene is that there is no Japanese rock scene."
Kaoru: "The good side to that is the fact that we don't have a rival here in Japan as their are no bands that can stimulate us here."

This is where I start to get angry. 

DIR EN GREY (ESPECIALLY KAORU AND KYO), DON'T YOU EVER FORGET WHERE YOU CAME FROM.  YOU ARE NOT HOT SH**.  YOUR JUST ANOTHER STEROTYPICAL "SCREAMO" BAND WHO THINKS THAT EVERYONE HERE IN AMERICA MUST WORRSHIP YOUR *OH SO HOLY* EXISTANCE.  A MERE TEN YEARS AGO, YOU WERE NOTHING MORE THAN A LUNA SEA RIP-OFF BAND.  GET THE FREAK OVER YOURSELF.

First off, It's sad that I expected that out of those two.  Like I said, Diru has definately changed for the worse.  Kyo, you know that I have issues with you; and Kaoru, you can *REALLY* stop being a jerk.  It's not attractive, and all you're trying to do is to impress your "new buddies."  What happened to the old leader-sama?

In fact, what happened to the old Dir en grey?  The old Diru would be at least somewhat coy about their vastly growing fanbase, and would *at least* acknowledge that the only reason they had recognition is becuase Yoshiki-san put his time, effort, and skills into that bad. (Not to say that they couldn't make it on thier own, they just had to have Yoshiki-san distinguish themselves.)

But to say that there is no Japanese rock scene?  THEN WTF DO YOU CALL X-JAPAN??!! THE ONLY REASON WHY YOU ARE HERE IS BECUASE OF THEM (and other bands around that time)!!!!!!!!  I can understand there not being many bands that are *similar* to you, but look around you.  There are tons of j-rock bands! 

And you know what, Kaoru....I bet you I can find a j-rock band that will blow you guys out water.  No wonder your popularity in YOUR OWN FREAKING COUNTRY is waning.  And making music shouldn't be a "rivalry", it should be a shared existance.  

Overall, I'm just tired of Diru being jerks.  It turns off the fans, and attracts the nasty ones.  I'm not asking you guys to don dresses and heavy lipstick again.  Hell, I'm not even asking you to have the same sound.  Just a few friendly words here and there would be nice.  You don't have to cater to our every need and be nice all the time, but damn....just realize that your fans freaking love you and want to see you prosper.  

That is all. 

.....Ah....Txt Messg Brkp by Kelley is love :-)

Anyways...on to more serious things.

Tonight I saw a report on World News Tonight that highly disturbed me.  It was a report about the stress that the troops in Iraq endure everyday, and the people (mainly Iraqi citizens) that are affected as well. 

I am so disgusted by this whole war.  I don't even want to talk about it.

All I want is for the troops to come back home, and to let the Iraqi people lead their lives like they did before their home was a "hell on earth". 

But I don't want to get too political, I just need to vent my fustrations with this current government.

Anyways....what's up with Dir en grey? I HAVEN'T HEARD NOR SEEN ANYTHING FROM YOU GUYS SINCE YOU'VE BEEN OVER HERE! JUST ON MEASLEY PICTURE! I KNOW YOU GUYS ARE HIDING!

Oh kaoru-kun, I know you guys are busy, (and I sound like a stalker) but really, I'm angsting for new stuff! 

I don't know why lately, but I'm not doing as many j-rock things as I used to, especially since art school. 
I guess it's good in some ways; I do get out of the house, and I have new inspiration for my art and portfolio building. 

But, tonight I think I'm going to dig up some ol' hide vids, and then top it off with some Luna Sea a la YouTube. 

Ah, the good old days of visual kei; where eyeliner and hairspray were HIGHLY abused. 
(I blame X-japan for the hole in the ozone layer, especially my beloved toshi-san.)

Hayden, Beth, Sam, and Kaitlyn....I freaking love you guys! 
(And you too Sinead, since I know you're looking at this ^_^).

Okay, I was writing this whole rant on people trying to shut down our comms becuase they were "questionable"; but my internet shut down (thank you internet) before I could post it.

So basically.....

FANDOM > LIVEJOURNAL ADMIN. AND THOSE FORCING THEM TO SHUT DOWN COMMS.

It might not be the admins. themselves, but they are the ones who are (were, actually) caving in.
Look, I understand that you are trying to protect society, and that's fine. 
Just don't shut down comms because you don't understand the fandom or you don't care. 
It's not fair to us, and it makes you look like jerks. 

With that being said, I'm glad all the frenzy died down and most of the communites were restored. 
Now all that we ask is to bring back our remaning fandoms that were deleted, and a little more communication in the future.

I'm excited about Live Earth; (btw, good cause....but very hypocritical.....how much gas is going to be ommitted into the atmosphere and ozone layer from rock concerts....I see your point Mr. Roger Daltry.) What about you guys?